Making something out of nothing.

I have always loved being a creative person. But I greatly struggle as a creative person.

The last 6 months have been a blessing. I’ve gotten to experience what I’m trying to call a “budget sabbatical.” The budget means unpaid. Haha. After a need for some changes and revisioning my family and I determined that I definitely needed a break from the road I had been traveling. So I took the summer off to rethink, revision, and rework my life plan. Now we are almost to November and I am definitely still figuring things out.

I would like to find a job. I would like to be able to travel more. I want to offer my children the best I can offer.

This being the case, we have learned that our kids need more attention than any work role I have found will allow. This has caused the last month or two to be more difficult than we hoped at this phase of our lives. But we are blessed in that we are succeeding in our struggle. I know full well that many are not in the same boat.

That being said, I am still learning to be patient and to trust my process even when I do need to light a fire under my own rear end.

I have learned a lot about my own personal strengths and weakness. I have learned a lot about what I want to accomplish with the life I have left to live. I have also learned that there are a lot of prices I am not willing to pay anymore in search of my dreams.

This world and our lives can feel awful dark at times. But we yearn for survival and we search for light…even in the darkest times.

The greatest gift I have been given in this season is time. I have time to breathe. I have time to learn new things. I have time to take on personal challenges I have never attempted. Even if I fail, I know the attempts were for the best.

So here I am. Making a website. Creating videos. Drawing more. And seeing what can come of that.

I’m also more available to my family. That is priceless.

A few years ago I graduated from a wonderful seminary program that taught me a lot. The greatest things I took away from that experience were the importance of community, the immense value in rest and reflection, and a truer sense in what my goals in this life are meant to be.

I do not know what the rest of this year or even the next few years has in store. But I am immensely hopeful in the possibilities because they are possibilities I care about.

I look back on all that has lead me to this point with joy. I look forward to the unknown void that is ahead of me with some worry but great deal of hope.

Wherever you are I hope you are finding the wonder that comes with existing. If you find yourself this far into my rambling I want you to know how much I cherish knowing you. Thanks for reading. And thanks for being a part of this world.

Keep meming. Keep dreaming. Peace.